Credit Crunch Chuff Soother

I'm a big fan of Assos and their high quality, if expensive, products.  Over time, I'm sure the extra comfort and longevity outweighs the initial pain in the bank account.

But at a tenner a jar, their hi-tech bum butter -- aka Assos Chamois Cream, is another matter.  

I think I may have found the perfect credit crunch solution, at least for British bikers.  I've experimented with Sudocreme nappy rash before, but its waterproof gunky-ness makes too much of a mess downstairs.

Step forward Waitrose Baby Bottom Butter -- an appealing blend of olive oil, camomile and vanilla that sounds like it should be on the menu at Heston Blumenthal's rather than stuffed down your shorts.

But at 2-pounds-50 a jar, it's worth a go.  Initial trials suggest it lacks the mentholated zing of Assos chamois creme -- not always what you want in the bibshort department anyway -- but seems pleasantly soothing and lubricating. Ahem.

If you're concerned by the notion of rubbing baby products into your sitting area, I can report that the label is easily detached.  You can then claim that your plain pot contains a secret mixture exclusively made up for you by Erik Zabel's Six-Day soigneur. I won't tell.